Pheasant and Blackberry Sauce
by goldenwanderer
Summary: A missing scene from Listener. Richard agrees to get Renn the food he wants, but has to explain that to Kahlan without telling her his big secret.


**Title:** Pheasant and Blackberry Sauce  
**Author:** goldenwanderer  
**Rating:** K/G  
**Summary: **When Renn threatens to tell Richard's secret to Kahlan if he doesn't get pheasant and blackberry sauce, Richard chooses to keep the secret safe and spoil the boy. But how will he explain that to Kahlan?  
**Notes:** This was written for the Missing Scene Fanfic Challenge for the Confessor and Seeker Society's Season One Celebration. It is a missing scene from season one, episode five, Listener.

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**Pheasant and Blackberry Sauce**

"How would you like her to know what you think about when you look at her?"

The question was simple enough. Richard's answer was simpler. He _didn't_ want Kahlan to know. Not just yet, anyway.

He didn't say his answer out loud. He didn't have to; the kid already knew what he was thinking. With a smug, triumphant look on his face, Renn handed the bowl back to Richard, knowing very well that Richard would do exactly as he asked now. A curse Richard would never have spoken out loud entered his mind, and Renn's smile widened. So, knowing things couldn't possibly get worse, Richard took the bowl and stood up.

"Fine," he said to the boy, "I'll get you your pheasant and blackberry sauce. But then, we've got to go. Understand?"

Renn nodded his understanding. Richard didn't need to be a Listener to know that the kid wasn't done with his scheming yet.

A few minutes later, as he was in the process of grabbing his hunting gear on the other side of camp, Richard's frustration had not abated. He was very glad Renn was not watching him at the moment – the words going through his head were not exactly appropriate for a boy that age. Then again, he was sure Renn had heard worse.

"Where are you going?"

Kahlan's voice interrupted his silent stewing. He looked up at her, and for a moment, he couldn't tear his eyes away. Her face was just so… _beautiful_. Then, he looked back down at his pack, as though just looking at her would reveal the secret he was working so hard to keep safe. He could feel his face flush as he thought about what Renn must have seen him thinking. This, he knew, was nothing.

"Just back a ways," he answered, trying to keep his voice steady. "There were a couple of pheasants back there. I thought I might try and catch us one or two."

Richard didn't look back up at her, but he knew what expression would be on her face right then: skepticism. He wasn't surprised to hear it in her voice when she spoke again. "Pheasant?"

"Yeah," he said. He finished packing up his things, then straightened. He met her eyes for a moment, then looked away again, still afraid she might catch something he didn't want her to see – yet. "Pheasant. I thought you said you like pheasant."

"I might have mentioned it once," she said, "but still, why now? Aren't we supposed to be in a bit of a hurry?"

Richard shrugged. _Yes_, he thought. But out loud, it came out, "I suppose. But we haven't had a decent meal in a while, and I thought it would do us some good." He paused for a moment to gauge Kahlan's reaction. She didn't look like she bought it. "Besides," he added quickly, "I'll bet Renn's hungry. He might enjoy something more than just cold mush."

Kahlan's expression didn't change at first – the skepticism was still quite clear. "Did Renn talk you into this?" she asked, her eyes fixed on Richard's.

"Maybe," Richard muttered. It would do no good to lie to a Confessor, but he wasn't about to tell her the whole truth. "I think he's just used to better food than we've got, that's all."

Kahlan's eyes rolled, and her hands went to her hips. "Richard, in case you've forgotten, we're in a bit of a hurry to get Renn to Thandor so we can get back to Zedd. We haven't got the time to continue to spoil the boy."

"Well, uh… I like pheasant too," Richard stammered, desperate to find something to say. "And so do you – you've said so yourself. I won't be long."

She didn't respond at first. She just stood there, unmoving, and Richard knew that he wouldn't be going anywhere unless he gave her a better explanation. But not the truth. No, he couldn't tell her the truth – _that she's beautiful and wonderful and headstrong and kind and understanding and knowing and strong and perfect and beautiful and I think I'm falling in love with her_ – not yet.

"Look, Kahlan, it's no big deal," he said finally, forcing himself to meet her eyes. He also forced down his thoughts of just how beautiful those eyes were. "Renn…" He wanted to say something about Renn's rough life, but then stopped, knowing that he'd already said it, and it wouldn't help. He sighed, then began to spit out the truth – or most of it. "Renn said he wouldn't go anywhere unless I got him some pheasant with blackberry sauce. I tried arguing, but the kid's stubborn." _And spoiled_, he added to himself.

"Richard…"

"I _know_ it won't help spoiling him more, Kahlan," Richard cut her off before she could finish her sentence. "I just want to keep the peace, if I can. He already doesn't like me."

"That's not true," Kahlan argued. "He just doesn't understand you quite yet."

Richard didn't respond to that. He dropped his eyes again without thinking. _I think he understands me better than you think_.

"Richard, are you all right?" Kahlan's voice was suddenly soft, concerned – no longer critical.

Richard looked up at her. She had taken her hands away from her hips, and had shifted her weight, so she no longer emulated the intimidating Confessor persona. Suddenly, she was just a woman concerned for her friend. Much as he admired the Confessor in Kahlan, this side of her felt more real to him – more natural. She tried too hard to appear strong, he thought – she was the strongest woman he had ever known, even when she didn't realize it.

"I'm all right," he said. "I just… I think some time alone would do me good." With that, he picked up his gear and moved past her – the woman he was falling in love with – and began moving back down the trail toward where Renn might have spotted the pheasant.

"Wait."

He froze at the sound of Kahlan's voice.

"Richard?"

He turned around to face her.

They stood face to face for a long moment. She said nothing.

"What is it, Kahlan?" he asked finally.

This time, it was Kahlan's eyes who dropped toward the ground. "Nothing," she murmured. "Just… go and bring back some pheasant, Seeker."

_Seeker_. The Seeker of Truth. That's who he was. Or who he was supposed to be. Kahlan only called him that when he had an important job to do, or when she suspected there was more to the truth than he could see.

Did she know? Did she know, somehow, that he was keeping something from her? Could she sense the feelings that he was beginning to harbor for her? Was that why she had called him back? Did she want him to tell her the truth?

More importantly, if that's what she wanted, could he?

As Richard Cypher turned to wander down the trail, the thought did not enter his mind that perhaps he was not the only one holding back a secret.


End file.
